A plastic surgeon just told me I have perfect lips.
I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy
Do you love your lips? DEEDADEETADEEDLYDOO-ABABADEEDADEDLY
hell yeah i’m a catholic i’ve been addicted to cats my whole life
So, I’m on register, there’s not many people in the lobby to witness this, but this guy comes in. Older gentlemen, maybe late fifties, and he comes in, not walking, not running, but DANCING.
It gets better. He dances the entire time he orders and then makes small talk with me, asking my name and shaking my hand (it was more like an awkward royal handclasp). Then I come to realize that he must be on something, because he makes these really weird statements, and when he gets his sandwich he’s like, “Oh, oh, oh, yeah, I like sandwiches. This is a nice sandwich.” He clasps my hand again, winks at me, and GIVES ME A TEN DOLLAR TIP!
Sir, you may be as creepy as you please.